was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
