My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
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This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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