You really coming over, don't trick.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
