it hurts more in the daytime
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
