i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
