Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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