I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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