Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
