Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
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