I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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