even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
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i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize