I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
