Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I'm at about main and main street
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
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