Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
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