defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
