the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
