using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
