Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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