I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
