Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize