Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Randomize
