i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
operation have a gay friend backfired
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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