my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Randomize
