Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
