I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Enjoy the penises
Randomize
