Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I don't think brook has ever known best
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
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I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Mom said you looked used
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
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So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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