i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Randomize
