and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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