Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Randomize
