omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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