Non-Jews are for practice
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
the day after is always just damage control
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
