After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
