Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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