Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
