I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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