He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
