Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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