Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
