why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
