The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
