My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize