Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
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