Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Do vagina's smell?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
