My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
