ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
