And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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