love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
