Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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