I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
