talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
