Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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